If you're a sex-crazed gangbanger, be careful what you wish for...
 
Victor Dracull is a vampire with a sense of humor, so he tells his three luscious female acolytes that they must each drink the blood of a murderer if they want to be able to go out in the sunlight to work on their tans. Then he places an ad in a skin magazine to lure suitable donors to them.
 
Duke Crandall and his pals are fresh from a spree of robbery and murder and anxious to spend their ill-gotten gains on sexual delights, so they enthusiastically respond to the ad.
 
On their way to Count Victor's domain, they spice things up by kidnapping a rich teenage sexpot and her namby-pamby boyfriend, sucking them into the zany supernatural world they are about to unwittingly step into.
 
Who will end up with the stolen money? Who will get the high-powered sex that they crave?
 
And who will end up undead?
 
The answers unfold in the wild and crazy wrap-up of...
 
1-800-VAMPIRE!